


Got no common sense

by Donteatthefootcream



Series: Winning Over Hearts [7]
Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Bisexual Edward Nygma, Demisexual Oswald Cobblepot, Depression, Ed and Ivy are pals, Ed needs hugs, Ed's library, Fluff, Idiots in Love, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Insecurity, M/M, Making Out, Manipulation, Mental Health Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-25
Updated: 2018-11-25
Packaged: 2019-08-28 23:11:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,166
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16732446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Donteatthefootcream/pseuds/Donteatthefootcream
Summary: Ed is so done with Jeremiah's existence. Everyone worries about Ed. Lee and Jim attempt to have Oswald turn Ed in. And, Ed discovers that it's nice to have a rock.





	Got no common sense

**Author's Note:**

> At this point in the story I greatly suggest going back and reading the entire series before continuing. 
> 
> Title is from "Somebody to Love" by Queen. 
> 
> Yes, I know it's been... two months? I'm a mess and I apologize heavily.

Being in love, double crossing a crazy mastermind, hiding from the GCPD, and working on a electrode connected to his heartbeat is rather overwhelming to Ed. Jeremiah and Oswald spoke and it's fair enough to say that it didn't go well. Oswald holds miraculous grudges, is a fabulous actor, and wasn't exactly having a good, productive day when the interaction occurred. However, Jeremiah hasn't let that dampen his spirits. He continues to be a pale hovering psychopath when it comes to Ed. 

 

So, Ed has had to come to up with some other lie to get him away from the man. He disappears every night on a trip to “release urges” almost every other night. Jeremiah never cares enough to have Ed elaborate. The supposed sexual outings Ed takes are helpful since he doesn’t actually go anywhere…. _Exciting_. Out of sheer luck Ed discovered an abandoned library in which he now inhabits to get away from Jeremiah and plan his own defeat of the irritant. 

 

The library is dark, lonely, silent, and has green undertones. Ed wishes most of his environments were like this one, but no one can have everything they want. If Ed could have whatever he wanted, he would be currently running this city with Oswald without trouble, but as logic and the GCPD would say, “No, that won’t be happening”. It’s unfortunate. 

 

“Don’t you get lonely and bored cooped up in here all night, Eddie?” 

 

Ed puts his pen down, refocusing his attention on his guest and not the diagram he’s been working on. 

 

“Ivy, you know I love your red hair and green, but now is  _ not  _ the time for small talk,” Ed replies coldly. 

 

She approaches, leaning her hand against the nice wooden desk. “Edward, I think you should go out and release some steam.” She winks at him. 

 

He groans, rolling his eyes. “I honestly  _ hate  _ that I let you see me there.” He flexes his fingers, stretching them out. “Besides, I’m in a complicated romantic relationship with the  _ King of Gotham _ ! I can no longer partake in… activities like  _ that _ .”

 

She wholeheartedly laughs, waving a hand at him. “Your secret is safe him me, but I’m sure Pandora will be missing you. Now-” She looks at the diagram on his table, the eraser marks almost making it indecipherable. She cringes. “-what are you doing, Ed?”

 

Ed looks down and sighs at the mess of a drawing and notes rewritten repeatedly over each other. “It would be safer for me not to share that information.”

 

Ivy frowns and leans against the sturdy table, crossing her arms. “Who has you under their thumb, Ed? I can-”

 

“Ivy, you don’t even know half of it. I’m under his. He’s under mine. It is a  _ very  _ complicated situation, but, I will let you know that I will be the one ending on top.” His smile is wide, his eyes glittering along with it. 

 

“Is it Oswald?”

 

“NO!” He allows his hands to raise and then fall passionately at his sides. “Do you  _ really  _ think we would be treating each other poorly after everything? I would hope not. We’ve both learned from our past mistakes. I’m not worried about anything.”

 

“Yeah… but he’s also  _ the Penguin _ , Edward. I’ve been his friend, his ally and all it got me was screwed over. I was a strong asset and he treated me horribly-”

 

“ _ He doesn’t love you, Ivy!  _ He loves me. Unconditionally.” 

 

Ivy huffs, looking away. “You know, when you were an edsicle, he talked to you. I even detected regret.” She looks back at Ed, patting his shoulder. “He does truly love you. Just- don’t let him get away with anything. If he does anything, unknowingly or not, you have to tell him. You deserve love, Ed. The right kind.”

 

Ed chuckles quietly, the amusement faked. “Funny. I don’t think that way.”

 

“God Ed.” She groans, running a hand through his hair. 

 

“I-I think I should tell him. Tell him about why this is so hard, to accept he loves me the way he does.”

 

She looks puzzled, looking him over. “I don’t know the  _ why  _ so I can’t help you there, Ed.”

 

“No one knows, Ivy. I haven’t told anyone, but- I think he deserves to know.”

 

“Well, if it’s traumatic and you’ve told  _ no one  _ then it might help with coping. It helps to talk about it sometimes, Ed.”

 

“Yes, I’ll think about it.”

 

“Okay, well, please promise to take care of yourself. Oswald doesn’t want you dead and I don’t either.”

 

Another piece of advice too late. Jeremiah is already headache. “Of course, Ivy. Don’t give yourself an ulcer over me. I’m completely fine and cared for.”

 

She takes a step back, looking around the dimly lit and empty library. “ _ Sure, Ed. _ ” 

 

“I-”

 

With a raise of her hand, she silences him. Unbelievably, he listens. “I don’t need your explanations. You wouldn’t be here if you didn’t want to be. I’ll see you later, Ed.”

 

Ed watches her leave, his mood worse than it was before she arrived. Her boots click echo through the building. The sound only reminds him of how lonely this whole building is. His life, admittedly is lonely. 

 

He recollects himself and exhales a breath he wasn’t aware of holding and turns around, putting a pencil back against the nearly gray page. This form of entertainment, a distraction from everything else, is dangerous and could get him killed. He sees that. Ivy sees that. Oswald sees that.

 

He doesn’t care. 

  
  


Ed doesn’t show up tonight like Oswald expected. The show airs five minutes later than expected and the murder is messy and quick. His performance isn’t as disturbingly bubbly or cheerful; it’s bland and emotionless, his eyes hard and cold. Something is wrong, and he won’t pick up his phone. 

 

“Oswald,” A visitor sternly calls from behind him. He can practically smell the blue. 

 

“Jim, I don’t remember us making an appointment,” Oswald replies sweetly, turning in his seat to face the nuisance. Or, nuisances. Lee Thompkins by his side. His smile drops. “You have got to be kidding me.”

 

Jim rounds the booth, pulling a chair out for himself. “Nope,” He responds coldly. 

 

“We’re here to talk about Ed, Oswald,” Lee explains shortly, sitting down. 

 

“I have nothing to say about him. I don’t know where he’s streaming it or making it. I don’t know where he’s hiding out. I have no information about dear Edward Nygma that is anything of a help-”

 

“We don’t want to speak about his broadcasts, Oswald. We want to talk about  _ him. _ ”

 

He falls back into the booth’s cushions.  _ They don’t know anything.  _ “I’ll bite. What about him?”

 

“You’re in love with him-” Jim opens. 

 

“Stop it,” Oswald snarls. 

 

“Don’t you want to protect him? The GCPD will not hesitate to shoot him on sight once we find him. This behavior is only going to get him killed, can’t you see that?” Lee continues for Jim. 

 

“He needs help, Oswald.”

 

“ _ Oh yes _ , because the two of you _care so deeply_ about Edward,” Oswald retorts. “One was framed by the man. Both of you acted as his friend. And the other? She used her  _ sex _ and his mental instability for their own gain. Isn’t that disrespectful towards _ yourself _ ? Isn’t that disrespectful of mental  _ health _ ? Isn’t that  _ inhuman _ ? I think so.”

 

“Os-”

 

Oswald cups his own face, making eye contact with Lee. “I always thought you were a feminist, Lee, but all I see is some woman who can’t control a group of druggies and drunks without a man. A woman who can’t be trusted and uses her looks to manipulate others. I’m not sure what did you wrong. The media or yourself.”

 

“ _ Penguin, you better shut up _ ,” Jim growls, warning him to stop. 

 

“No, he’s right,” Lee says quietly. “I made myself look terrible. And-” She glances at Oswald. “I hurt and took away his beloved for selfish reasons. He has the prerogative.”

 

There’s silence between the three. Oswald calms down, the tension in his posture diminishing. Lee is poised while the man beside her looks as if he’s hardly keeping it together.

 

Oswald gives in, shielding his eyes behind his hand. “He claims he has everything is under control, that it’s all going to plan, but-”

 

“His plans never work out, Oswald,” Jim  states. 

 

He nods. “Exactly.”

 

“Why is he doing it, Oswald? The televised murders? The torture?”

 

Oswald raises his head and scoffs. “Because he can. Because he’s hurt and wants to show  _ everyone  _ that he can take control. Put fear into the citizens of Gotham.”

 

“A power play?”

 

“You could put it like that, yes.”

 

“Where is he, Oswald?”

 

“I  _ truly  _ don’t know, Jim. I thought we already addressed this.” He glances at his phone to see a text waiting for him. “We talk. He calls or shows up out of nowhere. I don’t go to his. And, he doesn’t discuss where he’s taking care of his… show.”

 

Lee nods, focusing on Jim. “Ed’s smart, Jim. Of course he hasn’t told Oswald where he is. He’s keeping Oswald out of it. Making sure he’s not an accessory.” Lee shakes her head, smiling at Oswald. “He was always been crazy about you, even when he was with me. I’m surprised he never came with your name on his lips.”

 

He flushes at that, out of jealousy and embarrassment. “Are we done here?”

 

“Yes, we are.” Lee stands, waiting for Jim to follow her lead. “Jim, there’s nothing else Oswald can give us. All there is, is that this is personal.”

 

“Which makes it more dangerous.  _ Great. _ ”

 

Oswald watches their exchange of glances and the way they walk out together. He wants to pity her, seeing that she’s been brought back in to Jim Gordon world, yet he’s aware of how he’s changed for her. And, they simply keep crossing paths. Maybe the two of them will work out after all. 

 

He picks up his phone, opening it to see a scatter of messages from Ed. Amusing for Ed to be contacting him while having a discussion with the authorities about him. The majority of texts are one word: Oswald. Clearly, an obnoxious way to gain Oswald’s undivided attention. He doesn’t take his texts as important, they mostly endear him, until the last one:

 

_ We need to talk, Oswald.  _

 

A worried ache begins in his gut, his brain going right for the worst possibilities. He’s betraying him again. He’s leaving him for some manipulating, unloving female again. He’s ending it and going back to the way things were. The latter is the less painful one of them all. 

 

He shouldn’t be surprised, though. When has any relationship worked out for him? When has any person he loved stayed alive alongside him? When has any good thing lasted long? 

 

Oswald stands up, straightening out his suit and informs Ms. Finch that he’ll be leaving for the evening. He’s walking out to his car, cane in one hand and responding to Ed in the other. In the end, it doesn’t really matter what Ed is doing. He always manages to pick himself back up. 

 

The shallow belief that flows through new or uneducated Gothamites that he,  _ the Penguin _ , is weak deserve to be evicted. How could he, the King of Gotham and the most powerful gangster in the underworld, be perceived as weak? His limp is nothing compared to his passionate beatings or his threats and blackmails being followed through until the very last second. He manages to defeat men twice his size. To be thought of as anything but royal or powerful is offensive. 

 

What could a little more heartbreak do? Throw him into another emotional break where a handful of employees feel his wrath? Possibly. His kingdom won’t be taken away, however. And neither will its King be thrown out of commission. 

 

So, he doesn’t feel anything when his driver pulls into the street and he sends the text,  _ Certainly. I’ll see you at the mansion?  _ to his dear Riddler. 

  
  


The Van Dahl Mansion provides proof of Ed walking the floors. His heeled shoes placed neatly in the foyer closet, his green jacket is hung up with the bowler hat. He notices the fireplace lit in the living room along with a light. There’s nothing special put out or anything out of place. It all seems fairly casual. 

 

Oswald is startled when he feels gentle, large hands grip his arms from behind. He’s greeted with his a large grin, Ed’s white, shimmering teeth nearly blinding him. His shirt sleeves are rolled up, his glasses discarded on the table, his hair brushed back like always.  _ He’s perfect _ . 

 

“What do you need to talk about, Ed?” Oswald inquires, smiling back him. 

 

“I can be blind, I can be powerful, I can be difficult, deep, complicated, and tender at the same time. What am I?” 

 

“Love.”

 

Ed nods, slipping his hands down to Oswald’s hands. “I want to talk about love, Oswald. Because… if we’re going to try this. Try to make each other happy then you need to know things. About me.” His eyes look at the floor, his voice quiet and unsteady.

 

Oswald cocks his head in an attempt to regain Ed’s attention. “What’s wrong?” 

 

“We need to sit down.” He doesn’t look at Oswald as he walks to the couch. 

 

Ed’s sudden change in behavior is unnerving. His focus feeling as if it’s about anything that’s  _ not  _ in this room. His thoughts surrounding a secret, a memory that causes him to be distracted. 

 

“Do you need something to drink?” Oswald asks before sitting down next to him. 

 

“Oswald, I need to talk. To explain.”

 

“Okay, anything. Go ahead.”

 

He doesn’t sit next to Ed for them to be shoulder to shoulder. It’s too intimate, too soon. Allowing Ed to decide what to do next, Oswald is warmed by Ed moving just enough to touch his knee against his. A small form of contact. 

 

“I’m not from here, Oswald. I came to Gotham for university and have stayed here since. I haven’t returned home to see my family or past hangouts and schools. I don’t take pleasure in stepping foot in my home town where  _ everyone  _ bullied me and hurt me. I was different.  _ They  _ were different,” Ed begins, fiddling with his fingers and looking at the window, “Gotham is an utopia for people like me. _Like us._ Murders. Criminal masterminds…  _ queer _ . This city, the city I came from, weren’t nice to people like me. I read too many books. I spent too much time alone. I did drama club without a mess up. My clothes were too nicely put together. I seemed to look at…  _ both _ . And, umm… my parents they didn’t like that. That I couldn’t be  _ normal.  _ They would fight about whose fault it was for my birth. He hurt me.”

 

“Ed, I’m sorry-”

 

“No one has ever loved me, Oswald.  _ No one.  _ All I know about love is that sacrifices have to be made. Other than that? I have no idea. I don’t know how to be loved.” He lets out a strained noise. “My parents didn’t love me. The teacher didn’t like me correcting them. The kids thought I was strange, so did my co-workers at the GCPD. I was Ms. Kringle’s rebound. Isabella was what I thought was a second chance. She didn’t love me. She loved the risk I gave her.” He presses hard into his thigh with his hand, expressing some sort of anger. “Lee Thompkins used me for her own gain. And, I lost you because of it. But you, Oswald, you love me. You care for me and protect me. You treat me so kindly and you put me first. Even before your club. It’s a  _ Friday  _ night and you left early all because  _ I  _ texted you.”

 

“What I’m trying to say is: I’m sorry. I’m sorry for never realizing how much you loved me. How devoted you are to me. I’m sorry in advance for not knowing how to handle signs of endearment and affection. I’m sorry if I ever hurt you due to me wanting to go do something stupid for kicks.”

 

Oswald stares at him for a few seconds, and argues if he should be reaching out to comfort him or not. He chooses the former, scooting closer and rubbing a hand on his back. Reluctantly, Ed leans into him, his head resting on his shoulder in the quiet. 

 

“You should see my back. It has more scars than you’ll ever have,” Ed says, trying to break the tension with a smile. 

 

“Ed, listen to me,” Oswald starts, “You didn’t belong there. You belong here in Gotham where people respect you, out of fear or out of admiration. Those people didn’t deserve you and your talents. If I could, I would kill all of them brutally for hurting you. Most definitely your father.” He puts his hand in Ed’s hair, going through his hair and softly pulling at the ends. “Now, I don’t know how to teach you how to be loved, but believe me when I say this.  _ I love you. _ ”

 

Ed sits up, shifting enough to cup Oswald’s face. “I don’t deserve you.”

 

“Same here, dear.” He smiles softly, covering Ed’s hands with his own. 

 

He shakes his head, yet doesn’t respond. Instead, he presses his lips to Oswald’s. It feels right, even when Oswald tenses at first until responding just as passionately. Ed smiles against his lips while Oswald slowly moves his hands down his arms all the way down to his waist, making him shift to sit in Oswald’s lips. 

 

The obvious is that Oswald in fact is not a frequent kisser. His responses are uncoordinated and sloppy, but Ed wouldn’t have it any way. Especially when Ed bites on his bottom lip, gaining a gasp and permission to intrude his mouth. His hands have found themselves in Oswald’s hair, pushing him down into the couch. 

 

Ed pulls back enough to look down at Oswald’s face, gasping for air. Heat has rushed all over Oswald’s body, his blush bringing out his freckles. Ed’s fingers have ruined his hair and his ocean green eyes sparkle looking up at him. He’s beautiful.

 

“Ed-”

 

“You’re beautiful.” He ruins a finger down Oswald’s nose, kissing the tip of it. 

 

Ed watches Oswald’s eyelashes bat bashfully. “Well, you’re incredibly handsome.”

 

“God, I love you,” Ed laughs and returning to kiss him. 

 

Oswald’s hands grip tightly on Ed’s sides, making Ed groan deeply in his mouth. He gains satisfaction from receiving noises like that by gripping tightly. He smirks, trailing a hand back up Ed’s chest and rubbing it over his nipple. 

 

Ed moans, falling completely onto Oswald. He makes eye contact with him, Oswald’s brilliant smirking face and loses it when Oswald does it again. 

 

“Take me upstairs right now, Oswald,” Ed breathes out. 

 

“Hmm?”

 

“Take me upstairs right now, Oswald.” He kisses Oswald’s cheek. “ _ Please.” _

 

“Absolutely, my love.”

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly, this story is a huge, big "I don't exactly know where I'm going with this", but it's not a burden to write. I simply would like to know if any of you are actually reading this and enjoying it. 
> 
> In some comics, Ed and Ivy are friends so I look forward to their interactions. And, if I keep continuing this I'm excited for the Jeremiah and Ed fall out. 
> 
> Also, that is the furthest you'll ever see me get for smut. But, I will say this: Ed's a bottom. 
> 
> Thank you so much for reading this far, and leaving a comment or kudos.


End file.
